This ends...

...now.

I'm not going to screw around with the recovery hell I went through.  Writing here yesterday helped me to put things into perspective.  I've worked too hard to deal with this again.  I went home yesterday and talked to my boyfriend.  I explained that I've been slipping a little and asked him to check in with me in the mornings before work and not let me out the door without a snack.  So this is day 1.

I brought some bread and almond butter and I'm going to eat it.  There was some minor freaking out this morning since it just seemed like a ton of food I was packing.  I broke out the measuring cups and calculator for packing my lunch, which I haven't done in a while, but I think that's probably normal.  Once I get used to having this snack and see that I'm not gaining weight I think I'll chill about lunch again.  Hopefully.  I'll worry about that later.

Now I need to figure out some good snacks that require very little preparation and don't need to be refrigerated.  I think if I have to walk across the building to get my snack and take time to put it together I won't bother.  But if I have something quick and easy that has enough protein and carbs to keep me full and feeling better before dinner I think I'll stick with it.

I'm expecting the anxiety and all but I've been through this before.  It's only temporary.  Wish me luck!